It's been nearly a week since I reached my goal, finished my course, and celebrated at a fun Gala. The day after the Gala I gave myself permission to skip my walk. After all, I deserved it, didn't I?
What I discovered is that I don't want to stop walking. It means a lot to me to get outside everyday and loosen up my joints. So Mark and I took a lovely walk down to the beach.
I've been pondering my next goal and I don't know exactly what I'm doing yet. What I want to do still needs a plan.
You see I love working on myself. It gives me great joy to learn and grow. Ever since I lost my leg, I knew that I had to wring positive experiences from this situation to make it all worth it. Nine months after the accident, as I was walking on my college campus, I played the three wishes game: If I had three wishes, what would I ask for? The first thing that popped into my head was, "I want my leg back." No sooner had I formed the thought than another one formed around it, smothering it with wisdom. "No, you can't ask for your leg back. This is a life long gig. You're going to learn from this." Ever since then, I have. I've learned from being active in my twenties and finding my physical limits; I've learned from accepting; I've learned from the man who hit me and forgiving him, forgiving myself; I learned about pain and transcendence. The list goes on.
As you know, I'm turning 50 in a few weeks. I'm taking this very seriously. I see myself entering a time in life when I have the resources to give back to my world. Not necessarily financial resources, but experience, wisdom, and time. And I want my leg to be more than life lessons. Not that a life lessons aren't enough. They are. I just want more.
So I think there's a way to walk and somehow help others. That's the bones of my plan. I'll flesh it all out this week.
Stay tuned.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
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